I’ve never felt like this before.
Completely bound to someone.
This is intense
You know that feeling you get when you see someone you’re instantly attracted to?
You know it, you feel your heart rate speed up, you become breathless, your eyes feel like they will pop out of your head and in a way, you’re paralysed. You mind becomes consumed with thoughts of that person.
Well that’s the exact feeling that struck me when I first saw her.
I was sitting in the fishbowl, the fishbowl is the name everyone calls the office because it has glass windows and the staff walking out of their theatre walk along the corridor, past the office can see everything inside. We can see outside too.
She was strutting past in her theatre gear. Her height struck me first, then her shoulders and a sly smile. She had a certain air of confidence about her, one could also say arrogance.
I had to know her, I had to find out who she was and I had to speak to her but this air of confidence that attracted me to her also was to my detriment as I was terrified to speak to her.
Months would pass and we would often pass each other at work, again I would go weak at the knees and feel paralysed. I was so attracted to her. I remember one time that stick out in my mind. It was Cup Day 2013, I was working and the head anaesthetist arranged a Cup sweep. All the staff gathered into the tea room to watch the race and hopefully win some money. She was sitting on the lounge waiting for the race to begin and I was smitten and terrified all at once. I couldn’t concentrate on the race all I could think of was this person that I wanted to know so badly. The way she sat on the lounge, so cool, so bold. Those eyes, that face, oh that face! I was trying to make eye contact but she didn’t want a bar of me. I pulled out all the flirtatious moves I could within reason, we were at work afterall.
Months passed again and then one afternoon I was on Facebook and saw her name on a comment of a mutual friend.
I requested her friendship, she accepted immediately and we stuck up a conversation. Admittledly, I already had a few Gins under my belt, so I got straight to the point. Sadly for me she was in a relationship but I knew she was interested.
And then it all began